ADULT (Only 18+) SMS 

Wife: Muje lagta hai apka Rita k saath najayaz rishta hai.
Hubby: Ye tum kaise keh sakti ho?
Wife: Kal jab uske husband aye, to apki underwerr pehne huye the.

Recommended Dosage of  VIAGRA
New Girl friend: No need,
Old G/f: 1/2 tablet,
Mistress: 1 tablet,
Wife: 2 tabs + whisky + blue film + will power + her permission.

In bed frustrated wife was moaning to her husband: Why is it taking so long to cum?
Husband: I'm trying dear; it's just that I can’t think of anyone tonight!

A time comes in life when your wife begins to trust you. It doesn’t mean that you have become Enlightened. It doesn’t mean that you have turned a Saint. It just means that you have lost your hunting abilities; she is convinced that you cannot even catch a running tortoise, leave aside a PUSSY.

Wife 2 naked husband: Why r u walking around, the neighbours can see ur thing?
Husband: So what?
Wife: They'll think I married u for MONEY!

Wife A: I hate my Engineer husband. Erect & Erect.
Wife B: I Hate my Doc husband. Inject & Inject.
Wife C: U both r lucky, mine is judge… Tarikh pe Tarikh

On their first night:
Husband: Is it really ur first night?
Wife: No... No...Actually it is first time at night.

Woman was having pain during delivery.
Husband prayed: Oh Lord! Please make it loose 4 da Baby & thn tight 4 da Daddy.

Doc: Reports have got mixed up. I don't know if ur wife has AIDS or Alzheimer
Man: What shld I do?
Doc: Drop her in the middle of town, if she comes back DON'T FUCK

What is the difference between cheating ur wife and cheating on the taxman?
If u get caught, the taxman still want to screw you.

A frustrated father's defensive reply in a sms msg to his offensive unruly son... I should have wasted u in the bathroom!

One lady delivered twins, surprisingly one is boy & other is dog... How is it possible?
Her hubby is a hutch user... Wherever he goes his Network follows.

Dentist didn’t get erection on wedding night so he used finger.
Wife: What's this? Dentist: Nothing honey, just a temporary filling.

Wife n Mobile:
1) Dono hi dusro ke achche lagte hai.
2) Dono hi naye achche lagte hai.
3) Dono ko hi raat bhar charge karna padta hai.

Husband: I fancy kinky sex, how about I cum in ur ear?
Wife: No, I might go deaf!
Husband: I’ve been cumin in ur mouth 4 15yrs & u r still fuckin talking.

Ek pathan ki shaadi ke 3 din baad uski patni boli, "Maine apse shaadi is liye ki hai ki humare bache hon, is liye nahi ke mujhe poty khul kar aaye.
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